It’s like i wake up in the morning and have no idea what’s going on and all these thoughts are bouncing in and out and I’m like wtf for an hour and then i hear music and everything is excellent:
“To Thine Own Self Be True” Talkie Transcript
It’s like i wake up in the morning and have no idea what’s going on and all these thoughts are bouncing in and out and I’m like wtf for an hour and then i hear music and everything is excellent
It makes me wonder if i chose to be born. That awakening from the state of unconsciousness is overwhelming because of the massive amount of stimulation my brain encounters.
When I was younger, my parents told me i slept all day every day. The easiest baby that was ever born. I didn’t cry. I didn’t complain. I just wrapped my thumb around a piece of hair, usually from the carpet or my moms head, sucked my thumb and slept.
I keep my eyes closed.
I’ve been having a lot of dreams at nite. Full blown historical epochs with backstory and entire narratives/universal constructions. And i bounce in and out of them. Different timelines and choices being made in my own life.
Thats what makes me wonder, makes me think, did I choose to be born?
It’s almost as if all of the potentialities, situations, and circumstances of my own life weren’t even my own. I just got thrown into this experience and acted is if I knew what I was supposed to do when deep down it wasn’t like that, I was being done. Being experienced.
It’s like, congratulations you’re awake and your surrounded by all these people that care about you and you’ve got a warm bed and food regularly and school and sports and girls and drugs and pain and fear, challenge, grief, anxiety, happiness, joy, and ecstacy. here’s all this awesome stuff to fall into, bounce out of, and experience.
You’re gonna think your making choices, but really, you’re thinking that you’re making choices when everything is already set. The world is gonna crack you into submission eventually, but until that happens, you’re on a ride with no way off.
You’re smart enough not to do any dumb shit, like steal from stores or vandalize or put too much dope in the rig. You’re essence has a sort of calming effect, a charismatic understanding of dangerous energies. You seem to get yourself out of scrapes by feeling them before they occur…but its not good enough. It’s actually a detriment because you don’t take risk. You don’t move towards the things that could make you feel alive. Help you grow. You find what works, what’s comfortable, and stick with that. You stick with what you can control. You keep yourself safe, the same way you’re safe when you dream. When your unconscious. When you sleep…
If you chose to be born, you picked a heck of a body to enter into. A heck of a time. You could say it was perfect for you.
Dreams are at your fingertips. All around you. Everything is safe. Secure. Protected. Under control. You can pick up your phone and learn about anything you’ve ever wanted without having to grab a whip and indiana jones your way to treasure.
You can feel the sun and dance to the music and raid orgrimmar on the world of warcraft. You can build temples and shrines and honor gods of your own design. You can play super difficult Mario levels with all the best music anytime you want. And, people will watch you do it and root for you. They’ll cheer you on and keep you company and you don’t even need to leave your house.
Ultimate Freedom. Ultimate Choice. And unlimited potential…the only thing in the way is you.
I didn’t choose to be born. I was thrown into this experience. What makes me think I can choose to live?
It seems ultimate freedom is a release from responsibility. A release from results or planning strategizing and getting. Ultimate freedom is no choice at all. It is pure experience. Pure flow. And it unfolds according to the whim of its own design…
So i guess all we gotta do is
Lean back, Relax, and enjoy the show