We talk about growing up in East Cobb sippin sauce in the parking lot by Park 12 theatre, Detoxing during Family Vacations, Crying on the side of the road, and ending up in Rehab. Great Talk! Continue reading Inside the Minds Eye w/ Ben Lassiter
I used my last bit of dope in a parking lot outside of Papa Johns.
I wrote that sentence inside of an AA meeting…
And I’m not sure what’s supposed to be written next: Continue reading One Hour Closer to Being Free
I won’t be recording myself in 12-step meetings anymore.
Here’s the final episode of my two part podcast: Continue reading Powerlessness and Doing Scary Shit (#2)
My high school sweetheart died of a drug overdose.
I spoke to her 2 weeks before she OD’ed and told her that she needed to check into a detox.
She wouldn’t do it… Continue reading 11:11 Make a Wish
I decided that I hated everything about Alcoholics Anonymous about thirty seconds into the meeting. My ego did not like to admit to being vulnerable, even in a place where vulnerability is not only welcomed, but encouraged… Continue reading Anonymous Submission
If I believe I can do something and I’m stoic about achieving; I can attain. Removing drugs and alcohol from my life was a goal only I could reach. Each day, I had to center my thoughts on the singular purpose of not using. I developed a mentality of honesty and realized that when I shared my desire to be sober around others, it gave my past experiences value. Expressing my transparent thoughts and emotions created a daily drive towards success.
I found the same mentality has applied to what I want out of life. There are times when I can doubt myself, times when I can think that what I want is not possible; unreachable. Times when I doubt the integrity of those around me. Nobody sees the future like I do. Nobody feels the intense craving of success quite like I do.
Outside of 12-Step meetings, I found a new purpose. A new reason to wake up every morning. An opportunity to create the music I would like to hear. The people who had manifested themselves around me locked in to my ambition and we found ourselves a taste of success… Continue reading “A Glance Inside the Minds Eye” Part 2: The Disintegration of a Dream
I’ve awoken to find myself in hell. A singular thought, an obsessive craving, scratching and tearing at my mind.
I’ve held on to hope long enough to remain drug free for a minute, an hour, a day. I learned from others experiences living in a world where manufactured escape is not an option.
I found my gut, my conscience, fully intact. I started to look at the world with child-like wonder. I let my own passion drive me forward. I no longer had to hide from the experiences of my past. In recovery, I found honesty. Embarked on a journey of self-discovery that began as quickly as I decided to be honest with who I am and what I want out of life… Continue reading “A Glance Inside the Minds Eye” Part 1: Recovery