I felt like I had failed.
I was powerless over my emotions and I dumped them on her.
I think about that phone call, the last time we spoke, and I’m ashamed. Embarrassed. I forgot myself, I forgot what I knew to be true… Continue reading Karmic Knots
I used my last bit of dope in a parking lot outside of Papa Johns.
I wrote that sentence inside of an AA meeting…
And I’m not sure what’s supposed to be written next: Continue reading One Hour Closer to Being Free
Last night, Tully Scott joined us in the basement to share some of his story: Continue reading “Alive (Lord Willin’) Logic Remix
I couldn’t sleep. Every few minutes my eyes would look towards the phone to see if she saw the message I had sent. My mind ran circles around pain… Continue reading A Warm Bed in a Cold Room
“If you spend enough time in and around 12 step meetings, you’ll assume the narratives of other people.
You’ll regurgitate their beliefs, rather than your own.
We’ll say we never had a choice, and looking back, we’ll realize we really didn’t…” Continue reading We Have a Choice
If you’re wanting to hear a story about drug addiction, consequence, and the pursuit of artistry give this podcast a listen.
It’s weird as shit:
Continue reading Inside the Minds Eye w/ Hayes Johnson (Redux)
When heroin is removed, all that remains is the obsession.
When you don’t have it, you’re antsy and anxious and depressed. You can’t enjoy the weather, people, music, movies, or art.
The idea that people can be outside mowing the lawn, or talking on the phone, or smiling and laughing is unfathomable. Continue reading Rock Bottom
I was up all night doing cocaine before a 5am conditioning session with the football team.
20 minutes into the exercise, I blacked out and woke up in the hospital.
The doctors had me stay overnight to be observed. My Mom flew halfway up the east coast to make sure I was alright. Continue reading A Reflection on Collegiate, and Present, Consequence
I won’t be recording myself in 12-step meetings anymore.
Here’s the final episode of my two part podcast: Continue reading Powerlessness and Doing Scary Shit (#2)